Some people understand the need for change, whether it is political, social or personal. Awareness: something is going on and it needs to change. I have an issue that is holding me back. What can I do about this?
Some people are not comfortable with change. They are content with the way things are. They accept what is going on both in their internal or external environments. If their bargaining position is weakened, if their benefits are reduced or taken away, if they have a personal issue that is just too painful to deal with, if they are afraid of going into the unknown…well, they might complain, but mostly they adapt. All of these forgoing conditions create a condition opposed to change.
Dr. Bruce Lipton has said that our condition is the product of the first seven years of our lives, which he calls “hypnosis.” This is when we come into the world in a specific time and place with parents, siblings and socialization that defines us. If one is born in a poor and abusive environment, or into a home where a young one is spoiled and never needs to worry about love or a meal, yet who never learns the true meaning of values and social fairness…these experiences mould us.
The second part of our condition has to do with our desire to change unfavourable attitudes, beliefs and behaviours that undermine our path to personal growth. Many of these may have been established in our early years. The way to change the least useful and sometimes punishing things is through what he calls “Repetition.” We resolve to learn something or remap our negative thinking, and the way to do this is through consistent repetition of thoughts and actions which eventually become autonomic (we don’t have to consciously think about it anymore; it just happens, like playing an arpeggio on the piano in one beautiful sweep of the fingers and hands).
Now some people can argue with the details around this concept by Dr. Lipton, but it has been my experience that much of this holds true. I’ve spent many years investing in solutions to my earlier problems and the wrong thinking patterns they’ve created. Solutions? Take action: for me, many years included therapy, courses, reading and practice and, yes, repetition. I carried around a set of index cards on which I’d printed the mental reminders so important to healing and right thinking. These I called “Comfort Cards.” They were one tool and there were many others.
If you want change, ask questions, of yourself and others. And be honest, brutally honest. Use what is right for You. Experiment with meditation and prayer, how-to-learn books, sometimes corrective drugs can help you get relaxed enough to get started, observe what healthfully successful people do. It is work. It takes time and dedication, but it is worth every minute. Mostly, keep trying to do the right thing. When you have a couple small successes, you will see that the process works, and this gives the confidence you need to tackle bigger issues. If you have a gentle and hopeful attitude, it will go a long way to your new being.
As a final point, be prepared to carry in your background an acknowledgment that you may have scars and sometimes they itch, but we must constantly live in the present and make each single moment one in which a positive decision can be made. Those are the little steps that lead to the big strides. Walk on.